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Jamie Lee Curtis Will Pelvic Thrust Your Eyes To Death

I don’t know what I just watched. You won’t either. But one thing’s for sure: seeing it just once isn’t enough.

APPARENTLY there’s a 1985 movie called “Perfect” starring Jamie Lee Curtis and John Travolta in which the plot of the film is to pelvic thrust your eyes until they burst “a female aerobics instructor meets a male reporter doing a story on health clubs, but it isn’t love at first sight.” Given that “Perfect” has a measly IMDb score of 4.5, there isn’t a whole lot of love anywhere to be found.

I’ve never even heard of this movie before, much less have seen it, so needless to say I’d love to know what kind of dirt on health clubs Travolta is looking to dig up. Perhaps all the happy endings they’re giving in the massage rooms? Knowing Travolta, that’s probably it.

Regardless, the movie looks to be a quintessential snapshot at 1980’s fabulousness. Spandex? Check. Jazzercize? Check. Pastels? Check. Baggy yet tight clothing? Check.

Going deep down the YouTube rabbit hole of “1980’s jazzercise” reveals a whole bunch of highly choreographed examples of the strangely mesmerizing phenomenon, from movies to Saturday morning TV exercise programs.

But let’s face it, in real life, I’m willing to bet 95% of the people who actually schlepped down to their local workout studio in an effort to jazzercise in the wild looked like a bunch of out-of-sync schlubs prancing around like air-humping idiots.

Then again, I’m not afraid to admit that if Jamie Lee Curtis was my instructor doing said air-humping, I’d be more than willing to look like a fool for the privilege.

Included below is the trailer for “Perfect” and rather surprisingly it can be rented on most digital platforms (Amazon Prime, Apple TV, YouTube, etc.).

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