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This Year Celebrate Christmas Stoned Alone

Keep the Kush, you filthy animal.

Stoned Alone
Stoned Alone

“Guys, I’m smoking Kush and watching rubbish! You better come out and stop me!”

As the doom and gloom of 2020 continues, take my advice: bask in the simpler things in life this holiday season. Smoke a J. Pop open a Pepsi. Tear into a bag of Crunch Tators. Make yourself the biggest ice cream sundae that your two bloodshot eyes have ever seen. Then melt into the fattest recliner you own and watch a guilty pleasure movie.

Why? I say why not. A lot of what people do is dictated by tradition and expectations, especially around the holidays. But who do you have to please, really? The truth is people think about you far less than one assumes. It’s mostly in a person’s own head. Remember that deeply embarrassing thing you said at the Christmas table four years ago that still wakes you up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat? I’ll bet you Buzz’s entire life savings that hardly anybody gave it a second thought at the time and that NOBODY even remembers it now.

So go on, you do you this holiday season. Because we’ve all had to deal with a lot of shit this year everyone deserves a bit of genuine rest and relaxation.

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